Boundary Scripts

Exact words for the boundaries you've been softening

A boundary is a sentence you say once and live by every day after. Borrow these. Edit them. Use them tonight.

  • Situation

    He only texts after 10pm

    Say this

    I'm not available for late-night-only conversations. If you want to know me, text me during the day.

  • Situation

    He cancels last-minute, again

    Say this

    I noticed this is the second cancellation. I'm going to step back from planning with you until you're consistent.

  • Situation

    He wants to skip dating and 'see where it goes'

    Say this

    I date with intention. If 'seeing where it goes' is the plan, we're not aligned, and that's okay.

  • Situation

    He gets defensive when you name something

    Say this

    I'm not asking you to defend yourself. I'm asking you to hear me. We can pause and come back to this.

  • Situation

    He pushes for physical intimacy before you're ready

    Say this

    My yes is not on your timeline. If that is a deal-breaker for you, I respect it — and I am still not changing my answer.

  • Situation

    He keeps you a secret from his friends and family

    Say this

    I am not a private collection. If I'm not someone you introduce, I'm not someone you keep.

More boundary scripts in your inbox

Plus the 28-day journal that turns these scripts into a daily practice.

Prefer the whole journal now? Get the 28-day Selfish Era Dating Journal →

Sign in